Wednesday, September 18, 2013

Divorce Court Hearing

   A judge was interviewing a woman regarding her pending divorce and asked, "What are the grounds for your divorce?"

   She replied, "About four acres and a nice little home in the middle of the property with a stream running by."

   "No," he said, "I mean what is the foundation of this case?"

   "It is made of concrete, brick, and mortar," she responded.

   "I mean," he continued, "what are your relations like?"

   "I have an aunt and uncle living here in town, as well as my husband's parents."

   The judge took a deep breath and asked, "Do you have a real grudge?"

   "No," she replied, "we have a two-car carport and have never really needed one."

   "Please," he tried again, "is there any infidelity in your marriage?" 

   "No, both my son and daughter have high fidelity stereo sets. We don't necessarily like the music, but we can't seem to do anything about it."

   "Ma'am, does your husband ever beat you up?" 

   "Yes" she responded, "about twice a week he gets up earlier than I do."

   Finally, in frustration, the judge asked, "Lady, why do you want a divorce?"

   "Oh, I don't want a divorce," she replied. "I've never wanted a divorce. My husband's the one who wants a divorce. Says he can't communicate with me."

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