Transvestite: A guy who likes to eat, drink and be Mary.
His mind works like lightning, one brilliant flash and it is gone.
The only time the world beats a path to your door is when you're in the bathroom.
It used to be only death and taxes, Now, of course, there's shipping and handling, too.
My next house will have no kitchen – just vending machines and a large trash can.
Definition of a teenager? God's punishment, for enjoying sex.
Thought for the day: Be who you are and say what you feel because those that matter, don't mind; and those that mind, don't matter!
And As You Slide Down that Banister of Life You Should Pray That All The Splinters Are Pointed The Other Way.
Blessed are they who can laugh at themselves, for they shall never cease to be amused.