"Happy Anniversary Mom and Dad," gushed Son No. 1.
'Sorry I'm running late. I had an emergency at the hospital with a patient, you know how it is, and I didn't have time to get you a gift."
"Not to worry," said the father.
"Important thing is we're all together today."
Son No. 2 arrived. "You and Mom look great, Dad.
I just flew in from LA between depositions and didn't have time to shop for you."
"It's nothing," said the father.
"We're glad you were able to come."
Just then the daughter arrived.
"Hello and happy anniversary! Sorry, but my boss is sending me out of town and I was really busy packing so I didn't have time to get you anything."
After they had finished dessert, the father said,
"There's something your mother and I have wanted to tell you for a long time.
"You see, we were really poor, but we managed to send each of you to college.
Through the years your mother and I knew we loved each other very much, but we just never found the time to get married."
The three children gasped and said,
"WHAT? You mean we're bastards?"
"Yep", said the father,
"Cheap ones too..."